“If you build it, they will come” lie #4 of the Impostor Complex
Despite making a fantastic film back in the ’90s, this phrase is a bald-faced lie and if you believe it, you may enjoy a long long life with your friend The Impostor Complex.
Yes, my friends, we are putting a sacred cow out to pasture on this one!
Believing this lie could lead to unmet expectations and unacknowledged hidden agenda’s that affect your ability to create from a clear space.
(Quick caveat - Is it ALWAYS a lie that “If you build it they will come.” ?
For certain it is not. However, in my experience, 9 times out of 10, it is. So this article addresses the 9 times, not the 1)
Why is it so important to dismantle this particular lie?
Because too many women in business are confused about who they are. I was confused for A LONG time until my friend and colleague Tad Hargrave shared a perspective on The Artist path VS the Entrepreneurs Path LINK HERE
I take this one step deeper and connect it to the Impostor Complex because if you are an entrepreneur but you are behaving like an artist, your business could fall flat. When this happens you will have more evidence to bolster that Impostor Complex, that self-doubt and fear.
Entrepreneur - Creates for others to get a particular result. Lives on feedback, dialogue, conversation, and constant improvements and tweaks
Artist - Creates for themselves, and for others to have enjoyment, entertainment or introspection. Lives on the creative solo process. May come out of the “Creative Cave” to interact and have a discourse about their art, but is not looking for specific tweaks and suggestions as often.
Both of these paths are fantastic. And they are both terrible. This article has nothing to do with one being better than another.
This article is all about getting clear on which path you are on primarily so that you can stop giving your doubts any more fuel for the fire.
If you’re building a business, please continue having fun creating your creations. But focus most of your time on getting feedback and asking the question “Is this working? Are clients getting results?” It is less about you, your enjoyment and process, and more about the result clients are getting.
Please hear me, your enjoyment is also crucial!
But as a father, I can tell you that I had to come to terms with the horrible realization that between my wife and daughter, if circumstances came to it, one of them is to get on the lifeboat first. There is a priority of order if it came to it.
Oh boy, that got heavy!
The beauty, the lightness, and the play come in when you get clear about which path you are on, and you own it, and then find the space for the other path as well.
If you are on the entrepreneurs’ path, but pretending like you are on the artists’ path, then you won’t be asking for feedback, and your business ideas may suffer for it. It could lead to unmet expectations and you may not be acknowledging hiding agenda’s that affect your ability to create from a clear space.
If you have expectations about how your creations, or your business, will be received, you are at a disadvantage. And any doubt or fears you harbour will know it!
The solution?
Address the 4th Pillar of “The 8 Pillars of the Impostor Complex” and pick your specialty, your special sauce, that thing that makes you stand out as an entrepreneur.
If you'd like more information about all of the 8 pillars of the impostor complex and how to shift each one, CLICK HERE to get on the wait list for the coming PDF resource.
For now, here is a belief clearing to help you along.
“The belief that that being inspired and having a dream is the MOST important thing in my business (more important than my clients getting great results), would you be willing to destroy that at the point of creation?”
oh, I can feel the push back even as I write this!!! Am I saying that your inspiration, your dream, isn’t important? No. But if it was truly MORE important than your clients’ results, you would be on the artists’ path. Both paths are great, but they have a different set of daily actions, a different approach, a different philosophy. If you mix and match the two you will have more unmet expectations and unspoken agenda’s that will throw a wrench in your plans.
This is ALL about stepping out of judgement, expectations, and unacknowledged agenda’s. I use this concept of “Artist VS Entrepreneur” simply to highlight anywhere that you’ve become attached to the wrong thing so that you can release it, and move on to more joy and freedom.